As moms who run, I think we are constantly battling not feeling selfish. Especially when you are training for a race, the time it takes to log the miles you need, the hours you need to be out of the house, the dinners you need your husband to prep so you can get in a few miles before dark. We can easily justify running as our therapy, knowing it makes us a better mother, wife, and friend; that we are setting a positive example for our children showing them fitness is important; that we work hard to maintain a healthy lifestyle and keep a resemblance of our figure from before we had kids. Still, you can't help but think about the time you are spending on something you enjoy and feel a teeny tiny bit selfish.
I had a much different feeling after my run today.
I grew up with a running Mother. She ran marathons, 5K's 10K's, half marathons, ultra races, the grand canyon, the list goes on and on. She even trained competitively at one point when I was very young. She belonged to a running club that she met on a regular basis too. I have always told everyone that my favorite memory as a child was running out to meet my mom as she finished a long run, and how her legs felt, cold and damp, and the sweet smell of her sweat. I don't remember time missed with her because she was training. I remember how fun it was to watch her run by in a marathon; I remember how fun all of her running friends were(most are still in her and my life), and that sometimes we got to meet them all for pizza after their week night run. I remember how exciting it was to pack my lunch and put it in the basket on my bike as we rode all the way down to the beach with my mom for her long run. I remember being old enough to finally run with her, and how great it felt to make her try to keep up with me in high school. And I remember the first half marathon I ran, with her by my side every step of the way(even if she was wearing a giant GOT BEER mug on her head).
As I ran up the driveway this afternoon, to my 4 year old daughter waiting for me with her arms held out, I smiled. At first, because it was an awesome run- faster than I have gone in a while, and then because it was so sweet to see her excited. I told her to hop on her bike to do my cool down lap with me. We headed down the street, her curly blonde hair flowing behind her, and she looked back and smiled at me. I instantly started to cry. Not only because I knew it was a magical mommy moment, but because I knew how she felt looking at me, and then even more because I knew how my mom felt.
We finished the cool down lap, she got off her bike and gave me a big hug and said, "Mommy, you feel really wet."