Wednesday, May 18, 2011

It really is just a choice

First, can I start by saying the the San Diego Rock N Roll Marathon is just about 3 weeks away. I am officially starting to freak out.

Sunday morning I hit my snooze button at 5:30am, opting against my 12 mile run alone. It was cold, I was grumpy, and I just didn't feel like it. I decided to meet up with the other girls at 8 to get in a good 4-6 miles with some chatting and good gossip. My weekend was loooong, and interesting to say the least, so I think I wanted to chat about it, instead of let it stew in my own head alone on a long run...which I knew wouldn't end in a happy place.

I forced myself out of bed, got dressed quickly, and fumbled to find my phone that was ringing. As I answered it, I looked outside to see it was soaking wet. How did I not notice it rained?(I probably would have been off the hook at 5:30 anyway.) Shelly was clearly in her car on the way to the beach asking, or maybe hinting that we might not be running due to the weather. I assured her I was on my way, despite my awesome early morning voice that made it sound like I was still sleeping.

I pulled into the parking lot, and quickly behind me came Chelyse. We gave each other the 'eye'; you know, the one where you silently let the other person know all they have to do is say the word and the run is off. Except that nobody ever says it. Getting out of the car, we quickly realize that the wind is crazy, and it is freeeeeeezing. We hop in her car to wait for anyone else, knowing of course Shelly was on her way. I was relieved to get a few more sips of my coffee in, and start the rant about my weekend. Shelly walked up and got in the car, and we were playing a fun game with a car next to us, who was also tiptoeing around the idea of actually going out in this weather. The members of the other car got out, lasted 1 minute, got back in and left. We took that as permission to continue my therapy session for a few more minutes...hey, we would get out once it cleared up. Then the rain started pouring down. Phew....we were not in the mood to run in the rain.

It was nice to still get my chatting time in with the girls, even without our run. I needed a little vent, a little perspective, and a few girls on my side to say they completely understand.

The conversation moved on and Chelyse said something that struck a cord with me and how I live my life, and of course it reminded me of some advice from my mom a few years back.

Being happy, enjoying life, and living it to the fullest really is just a choice. A concious decision you make and remake everyday. The happy people you see in life aren't the ones where everything is amazing...you just don't notice any of the bad stuff in their life because they are too busy smiling.

I think about people that have the worst cases handed to them in life. People who are paralyzed, lose their vision, or limbs, who lose a child, or battle a terrible ilness such as cancer. You see them out there training for triathalons, climbing mountains, advocating for safer laws, and fighting for those around them. They made the choice, not to bury their head in the sand and feel sorry for themselves, but to rise above, and enjoy their life to the fullest. It makes you wonder if you would be that strong. And then it really makes you think, what the hell am I whining about??

Maybe it's having running in my life that has given me the mental toughness and strength to know that I really can will myself to do anything. I know that mind over matter works, because I know how it feels at mile 22 in a marathon.

So choosing to be happy, to enjoy my life, and what I do, seems like a no brainer. You may say easier said than done...but I think that means you just haven't tried it.

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